That hits home for me, for obvious reasons, because I adore my sons and now every time someone makes a comment while we're out and about I say with a smile "yes, I'm busy and I'm training warriors! God thought I was tough enough!" Almost always, I get a smile back with almost a sigh of relief that they'd see a mom full of little men who's actually happy about it. Maybe I didn't get the memo on being ungrateful for healthy sons?
I have had all kinds of comments, from strangers but also from family members who weren't thinking about what they were saying. From "you've got your hands full", "all boys?! You poor thing!" And my favorite after finding out Gabriel was a boy "another boy? Oh, honey, I'm sorry, maybe next time" (did she just apologize?!) or how about "aw, bummer...maybe next time you can try harder for a girl". Uh, yes, I was told those things while pregnant, while carrying LIFE, not just a gender. I remember holding my belly tight after those comments and telling him "I love you so much Gabriel! I want you!" And oh, how I adore that curly headed boy, I don't know what I'd do without any of them. I think it's also the reason I wanted to protect my third baby from any outsider comment and I loved my child no matter who I was carrying inside, and I don't regret not finding out with the ultrasound.
Yep. True stories. We gotta think before you speak, don't we?. Or how about making comments about women who have all girls? "Aw, I bet you feel incomplete without a son" (of course not!) or how about adoption? "Is he/she yours?" (Of course they are!) Or perhaps to those who've miscarried, "I'm sorry that happened, but they're better in heaven than here" (seriously?!) also, the famous comments made to women expecting baby #5,6,7+ "uh, geez, don't you all know what causes this? There's a pill for that" that is a horrible thing to say. EVERY child is a blessing from God. Sons and daughters equal.
Sadly, all that happens way too often.
Of course it would be nice to have daughters, I'm not saying I wouldn't want them if that's what The Lord wants, but I love my sons and I feel protective of them, they are and have been very wanted by us! I trust The Lord, He decides what is best for our family, not me, I fully trust Him on that one. So, next time you find out someone is expecting a baby, please! simply congratulate them and understand that children are a blessing from God, not a burden or a gender trophy to display. They are tough work! Lol, it takes warriors to shape the arrows God gives for the quiver (if you've never read that verse in the Bible, go read it pronto! Psalm 127), it takes a leader to be able to sharpen those arrows so they can be sent into the Kingdom with a target, with knowledge of their purpose and calling and an understanding on destroying their enemy. That is why God wants children and commanded us to fill the earth, to build His Kingdom for His glory, but apparently with the average sized Christian family of 2 kids vs the Muslim womb (which is their weapon, so they call it) average of 4.5 per family, we're not getting it...and we have become deaf to truth and too comfortable, why is God's Bride following worldly advice and being selfish with her body? Why does she not want to carry and birth the souls her husband so desperately wants to give her? why does she have such a hard time submitting to the Holy Spirit's desires? He longs to give her not only spiritual sons and daughters but also earthly ones. The natural comes before the spiritual, perhaps that's why we aren't harvesting all those spiritual sons and daughters we strive for! Would you like to know where the true battle lies? have you ever thought of all the baby girls that are being aborted in China because of their one child policy and how they prefer to have boys? it is true and it is happening right now! I dare say millions of souls are being aborted simply because the enemy has lied to them about boys being better for their families, the same is happening now in India, where the ratio of girls vs boys is crazy low, look it up, and it continues to decline drastically, and what's going to happen in 100 years from now? No, I won't go that far, what is happening NOW, is that little girls are being kidnapped by families of boys to preserve them for their sons, because in the future, their sons won't have women to marry! they will begin turning towards each other, and homosexuality has risen in the last decade for the same reason. This is the real battle, friends. It's not about who gets who, not about bragging rights, it's about souls, abortion is murder and sin and the enemy loves to steal and destroy souls, if he can destroy them before they are even born, even better, then the possibility of missionaries, Pastors, evangelists and apostles will be cut off, if he can destroy the idea of what family means and why God wants families to grow, then he has also won a battle. If he can destroy women's view of themselves and how valuable they are at home and their calling to motherhood, he has won another battle. Society has everything upside down and we suffer for it.
No, I'm not talking about contraception or that everyone should have 19 kids and counting and have their own show, haha, that's a whoooole'nother story, so I don't wish to get into that can'o worms. I do not wish to hurt or offend anyone who decided to have 1-2 children or even those who have decided to wait for a few years, I don't know your motives, reasons or heart, I cannot judge you and will not do that.
To those who cannot conceive or continue to lose babies, I in no way mean to offend or hurt with all of this, I believe God is in complete control and only He knows why that happens and I wish I had the answer for you. I can only offer my prayers and hugs.
I am amazed at how God changes someone's heart...from being a "driven-me a stay at home mom? Never!- unsatisfied-I only want 2 kids so I can go out do my own thing for God" to who I am now, God knows what will make your heart satisfied and rejoice if you let your heart be soft and not hard to his teachings and his loving and gentle breakings. Last Sunday, while signing a song at Church that said "you've restored the joy of my Salvation" it hit me, revelation hit me, I stood there and tears fell. I realized that Jesus restored the joy of my salvation by simply restoring my identity as a woman, by showing me through His Word and mentors that I don't even know in person, what He says about women, about mothers, about His desire for my life, it's all in there! once my eyes were opened and I laid down my life, my dreams, my desires; my joy was restored, my hope renewed and my heart soared! I don't have to fight for a spot in this world, I am hidden in Christ. I don't have to prove my strength to anyone, I am strongest when I let Him work through my weaknesses! And this is a message that now burns in my heart for all women, specially younger women, I can only hope one day I will be used to encourage others. This is right now, my favorite verse: Titus 2:4, because we need more mothers in the Faith as much as we need Fathers for men! we need more mature women to teach the younger ones how to be godly wives and mothers, we don't have enough.
Sorry if I kind of rambled, lol, hope it made sense. I guess I had a lot to share!
Thank you for reading!
With much love,
The fruitful mama.
PS if this post makes you upset, please be gracious and let me know, I will promptly apologize. I wish to hurt no one.
Children are a heritage from the Lord,
offspring a reward from Him.
Like arrows in the hands of a warrior,
are children born in one's youth.
Blessed is the man
who's quiver is full of them.
They will not be put to shame
when they contend with their opponent in court.
Psalm 127:3-5
Has not the one God made you?
You belong to him in body and spirit.
And what does the one God seek? Godly offspring.
Malachi 2:15
